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no more caffeine.

 

tell me where do i go when i don't understand a single thing in life?
how to stop covering my scars by making jokes every time they ask how is my life going on. 
how to stop pushing people away when i refuse to open up about my grief. 

tell me what should i do,
when i have tons of ambitions to accomplish goals but at the same time,
zero motivation to move forward

what if i'll never get over my depression
and keep forgetting my dreams day by day
what if this pain only get worse as the time goes
and at the end, i lose myself.
nowhere near the future all the numbness and emptiness will find their way back.

but deep down, i know
i want to stop this.
but deep down i know
i need to get over this.

-num

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